it all makes my head very dizzy...
for some reason, committing four years to a university, and one year to another, and a year on the road... wasn't a big deal...
signing 2-3 years to a job: terrifying...
maybe it's the commitment, maybe its the responsibility of having to actually contribute to a cause (in a financial sense, i guess all senses really... but its the financial that is scary), maybe its the idea of having a salary... the last salary i had was the summer contract at RWBC... $2500 for the summer i think, and when we broke it down, cuz we technically worked 24 hours for 5 1/2 days a week or something like that, it was under a dollar an hour... i'm so used to just barely making it in the black, being able to pay for rent, bills, and food (and actually, most of that money came from loans -- such a typical american!)... the idea of having more than that... somewhat scary...
lots of other details as well... insurance, immigration, travel arrangements, taxes, community involvement...
i've spent a lot of my recent life trusting on God... he's informed me that we've been through nothing yet, and get ready to redefine my idea of trust...
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