again, the questions of where to do next lie in front of me... where to live, what to do when i'm there, who to be with, the questions we all face... moving in with my parents is an option, where i would work in that little town is a huge question but i have the blind faith that something would work out, as would meeting new people and friendships to be formed... the faith that i would be happy there is severly lacking, however... staying in the uk for a bit longer is also an option, albeit a more complicated one, logistically... all and all, the one thing i fear is getting stuck... i don't want to get bored, burnt-out, isolated in my own depressed and idle state... i would want out... but where would i go then? where is out? is that going to be a life-long trend -- i get bored, so i want out, something new, foreign, terrifying, different... eleanor roosevelt said "do one thing everyday that scares you"... it keeps the adrenile up, the nerves awake, the senses alive, life unpredictable...
a good thing, i'm not bored in scotland yet... i complain about the weather, but on days when the sun shines, i can't help but smile... i guess the rain even makes me laugh sometimes... but when is this stage of my life done? when is my next tangent? and where will it go...
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